10 pounds down 32 pounds to go!

Thursday, April 30, 2009

"Mostly you're kindof impossible."

Ugh, I have nothing of interest to say lately, we've been really busy up in the garden. I'm friggin' beat from all the manual labor and I haven't had an ounce of energy for exercise. Matt and I have been killing ourselves to get the holes dug for the fruit trees coming tomorrow. I moved two stacks of wood this morning and I'm beat and it's only 8:30. My work days have been filled with walking and hiking lately and my legs are killing me. In a good way but OW! I know it's good for me I just wish I could see a difference. Patience is a virtue, right?

It's probably good that I haven't had the energy or determination to push myself to exercise because I've had more injuries the last weeks than, uhm, ever. I twisted my ankle pretty well last week, not enough to stop walking because I had to but I felt it. Today I slipped coming back down the hill and sat on my own wrist. I don't really know how I managed that, it was pretty uncomfortable. It seems fine now but it's true that tired ouchy people have more accidents. You know what, I'm a moron. I was just going to type that I didn't start falling until we started working long hours but that's not true. I'm always tripping over myself, sliding in the snow and mud going up to the garden area. I guess it just hurts more when I hurt already. I think my brain is injured too.

As an unrelated note of interest I'm watching the last season of the Dead Zone and they're at a very fancy bus station in Bangor and they just mentioned service to Bar Harbor. Firstly, there ain't no busses that go to Bar Harbor and secondly, I've been to the bus station in Bangor and it's smaller than my bedroom and drowning in orange plastic. I appreciate their efforts though, totally worth complaining about.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

"four out of five dead people smoked your brand"

I ate three cupcakes of the cupcakes I made for matt. Puppy ate one whole cupcake, and one top...sans frosting. At least he didn't eat the sugar. It's sort of a shame because I've been trying to watch the sugar lately. My blood sugar has been way out of control lately and I'm just trying to feel better. Eating the cupcakes was entirely my fault, I'm blaming the heat and the thunderstorm and the sunburn. It's not supposed to be 90 in maine in april. Or ever actually. It was way too hot and then we had a thunderstorm and somehow my chastity belt like sunblock allowed me to get burnt. It's not a terrible burn but bad enough to be uncomfortable and really, really tired. I need a parasol, made of flannel.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Banana cream whoopsie

A while back I passed a display of banana cream pudding with the bananas at the grocery store. I couldn't stop thinking about it...so I bought some a few weeks ago. I hadn't felt like making it yet so it's been sitting in the cupboard, waiting. Two days ago I bought some vanilla pudding mix to make Matt's mom's birthday present...exactly the way her mom used to make it. I was mixing it up today for her birthday tomorrow and funny enough, banana. Banana cream puffs. Which would be interesting if it wasn't supposed to be a specific dessert for a specific person. So, now I have cupcakes, cream puffs and two tiny banana cream pies in my fridge. Damnit.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

"Every little boy fantasizes about his fairytale wedding."

I twisted my ankle yesterday and thank god because Tracy totally said I didn't have to work out if I was injured. WooHoo! No, it's not that bad, we're just having a rough few days here. No one's been sleeping, what with the hiss, growl, bark routine being perfected in the middle of the night. Yesterday I thought if I kept them awake all day they'd have to sleep all night. I prodded them every ten minutes but it still only bought us quiet for the hours of 9-2am. Sheesh.

My brain doesn't seem to be working lately, what with the sleep deprivation. The list of things I'm supposed to do today is treacherous. I have to bake cupcakes and cream puffs and I have to order shoes. I just finished that super hard task, the shoe ordering. It took 2 months to find winter boots so if I start looking for hiking shoes now I should have some by christmas. I'm doing a lot of hiking with the dog and with my client and since I turned my ankle just walking up to the garden it's not overdue to get the right boots. Matt thinks I'm just trying to fill up the spaces where the sold shoes had been...I sincerely hope that never happens.

Friday, April 24, 2009

"You were there, I remember you being there."

Puppy ate my wrinkle cream. I guess he's trying to hold on to his first blush of youth. I was using a sample packet I got with something else I don't even remember buying. I'm using it to try and fix a divot in my face. I'm assuming it was an acne, uhm, hole but it's starting to really look like a big ass wrinkle. You can't tell by the blog because of all the words but I make faces a lot. I'm a face maker. I do it all the time and I just can't stop. Mayqueen could tell you all about the faces I made when I got my tattoos but it's not just needles and ink that make me facey. I do it when I'm all alone, with friends, with the dog and definitely on the phone. I think my face muscles are independent of my nervous system, no other explanation. Anyway, I'm trying to prevent wearing my silly face for the rest of my life with cream, expensive ass cream. Ahem, expensive face cream...for posterity.

Regarding the news of other sample packets I have used lately, John Freida curly shampoo. It was very much like Shirley Temple with her finger in an electrical socket. I kind of loved it. Sample packets rule. I got a tiny tube of spf 90 with my much more moderate spf 70 sunscreen purchase. 90 is serious spfing. I expect wearing it will be like alaska when the sun doesn't come out for three months. Can't wait! I couldn't find a less spfy spf, not that I need one, it seemed like all they had was super human spfs. A hundred years ago I read that nothing more than 50 was effective but it seems like the people who make it didn't read that article. I'm expecting spf seven trillion next summer, maybe I should patent it.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

"If you gain weight, you will die."

So, Tracy Anderson does this thing with her abs that I just don't get. Standing ab work, it's called. I've been doing it and feeling like a moron since I got the dvd. I know I'm not doing it right and I can't really figure out how I'm supposed to do it and when my no fat back guarantee falls through the cracks it'll be totally my own fault. I am however keeping up with the arm thing which is the worst and yet the most necessary. My shoulders are seriously killing me all the time, ALL THE TIME. I feel like it's a justified penance, probably the catholic school talking. I keep waiting to see my miraculous new arms but I guess I'll have to be patient...and maybe light a candle.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

"I'm not disabled and neither are you."

I'm seriously happy with my breasts today. I'm feeling very woman power regarding my chest right now. I should buy new bras all the time, it's great for the morale. New bras and new jeans, selling off all my old stuff...I'm feeling very new and improved lately. I'm trying to improve my house too, I'm thinking about painting more rooms. When we moved in I only painted the one room because I'm lazy. Since we're going to be in the apartment for at least another year I feel like changing it up a little and I have the time, so I'm going to get unlazy on the painting. I started painting the door...uhm...last year and I haven't finished yet so I guess that's where I'll start. If I can't complete that I'd better not start the kitchen or we'll be living in an episode of extreme makeover forever.

What else...dude, I wish there was something going on to write about. Cooking, cleaning, ebaying...god I'm boring. I'm boring myself. I must have done 6 loads of laundry yesterday, that was my big accomplishment...LAUNDRY. Apparently we're dirty. I did all the curtains and sheets and all the towels that were covering puppy chewing hot spots, spring things like that. It sucks having a house, I realize now that I never appreciated my dorm room...so few things to wash...

Monday, April 20, 2009

"you shouldn't rob a bank without a plan, you shouldn't use your tongue to stop a fan"

I went in to victoria's secret looking for a sports bra and came out with half a paycheck worth of underthings. I found one I like, I just tested it out on the trail and no bouncing, but I also found a few every day bras that kick the ass out of the every day bras I had before. Now I just have to toss out all the old ones. EVERY LAST ONE before it becomes a historic collection of bras that suck. Thanks to everyone for the advice on sports bras. I've been trying different bras almost since last summer and it was getting a little desperate.

It was a good weekend over all, we took a lot of walks with the woof but we also ate everything in the state of New Hampshire. My dad stocks a lot of food that I never buy and I always find it hard not to graze. There's a reason I don't buy snacks, I don't even want them when I'm home. I think it's a dad thing to have a house full of food and to give the children a full menu review every ten minutes or so. "There's cookies here and ice cream in the fridge", it wasn't even yummy food it was just there. So many things to work on...always.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

"I think I'm goin' crazy every time I pass a vending machine."

Someone asked me recently how Matt was going to pay for his many domestic sins of late, telling me the truth about my hair...HELLO! Karma worked itself out because last night he asked me to give him a haircut. Heh. Not that I sabotaged it on purpose, or that he cared at all, it just looks a little weird. Not as crazy as the Billy Ray Cyrus meets Farrah Fawcett thing he had going on before, but I keep seeing hairs that I missed and it annoys me.

We were in a hurry because we're trying to pack for a very short visit home. Puppy needed a bath (which he is just so patient about, yay!) and dishes needed to be done and also the packing. I imagine traveling with a baby is supposed to be more work but it seems to me they have similar paraphernalia with the exception of clothes. We're taking every toy, snack, bed, and gate we can lay hands on so as not to cause too much trouble. He's really very good in other people's homes. He's really very good all the time but if he injures an inch of my dad's house we'll never hear the end of it so it's all hands on deck.

I'm going to search for a sports bra and I think the ladies in the comments are quite right about just finding something that works no matter what it's called. So wise. So that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to try on bras until my arms fall off or my boyfriend dies of mall exhaustion. It's a very important mission.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Enell sports bra

Has anyone tried one? I decided recently, maybe because I work with an 84 year old woman who is fitter than I am, that I should make an effort to keep my body parts where they are. Matt readily agrees so I'm going to spend some dosh on bras. Let me know if you guys have any breast information to share!

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

"You failed extremely well."

Remember that girl who passed out in my office at my last job? And when I had to explain to my boss in vivid detail how I knew she was unconscious. Today my client passed out on me in her apartment. Actually, she had a seizure. A tiny little seizure she apparently gets every once in a while. And when I called the authorities that be they said "oh, that happens some times...don't worry about it". Imagine that? Instead of an afternoon full of lecture and insanity, they actually trusted me to do the right thing. Can you imagine? It's really very lovely.

As an extra point of goodness that is my work, I got three walks today. Of course one of them included shepherding two old people with walking sticks on a trail that was mostly washed out which none of us has ever walked before while being completely abandoned by the walk leaders. It was great! Getting lost in the woods with old people is a slice of heaven for the eldercare worker. I'm a little upset about it actually, the whole point of walking with a group is for the the camaraderie and the safety and to have the entire group frickin' leave before everyone gets back seems to be pretty unsafe to me. But maybe I'm sensitive. What do y'all think?

Monday, April 13, 2009

"I'm sweating like Whitney Houston going through customs!"

Woof was awesome today. He couldn't have been a more gentlemanly fur meeting my elderly friend. He snuggled and licked her face and then fell asleep on the carpet. Which I'm pretty sure means they're best friends now. However, I didn't get my hair cut which means I ruined my hair dying for nothing. I didn't think I'd done such a bad job, I shortened the time considering it was going to be washed out anyway so that I could do it again sooner and matt pointed out that it is in fact two colors. If he keeps it up I might start poisoning his food. Sheesh.

"Not bad for a dazzle dancer!"

I've started off today in a very bad no good way. You know that scene in legally blonde where she solves the murder with the rules of haircare? I just tried to dye my hair when I have a haircut this afternoon. If someone dies today my alibi is shot. Puppy and I have a big day today so it would be good if I wasn't arrested. I've been waiting more than a month to get the haircut and and I have a slew of other things to do. We're canning the maple syrup harvest tonight so I really have to get the kitchen in order. We're going to need every inch of counter and since it's going to be sticky sticky, there's a reason they cook it outdoors, so it's in my best interest to move everything elsewhere. I've canned a few things but I've never canned maple syrup so it ought to be interesting.

I have placed tracy in the dvd player and I can't put anything else in until it's complete. I got the warm up and the first leg section done yesterday but I'm forcing myself to start over today. It wouldn't really be in my interest to skip the warm up anyway. I have to admit that my muscles are still burning with basic everyday movements. She's not wrong about using muscles that you don't normally use. However, I can't say my weight or waist have changed any. I think my new work environment has had a big effect on that because we've done a lot of eating out these last weeks. So, I'm buying myself a food thermos. I really need to be eating my own food for all kinds of reasons and I think the thermos will help. That way I can whip out a warm lunch and she won't feel a need to order food for me and I won't be eating restaurant food so often. Money, calories, lots of good reasons to pack a lunch that I don't need to heat. I'm crossing my fingers it works as well as I think it will.

Friday, April 10, 2009

"One pie is like an appetizer to me, I eat that and I unleash the beast!"

I returned a pair of jeans to the Gap today and can I tell you about the hard time those folks have been giving me with returns lately. The last two times I've bought something online and returned it in store they've given me shit. Last time there was a cat hair on the pants and she said they'd have to damage them out. I offered to go buy a lint roller for the one cat hair and surprisingly she said no. This time she asked where the tags were. If you buy online from gap you'd know that you don't get tags. Sometimes you get a jeans tag on the back waist but usually there are no tags at all. AT ALL. And by the way I kept two of the three pairs which is like seeing Jesus in your breakfast toast as jeans shopping goes. If they would stock my jean size, not everyone can be tall enough to be a regular...seriously...we wouldn't have this problem. I could try clothes on in the store like a normal person and have good blog fodder dressing room trauma. Thieves are the Gap, thieves.

So, hey two pairs of jeans fit and I even like them. I was debating about keeping two pairs when I only really need one. Matt thought my but looked cute in both pairs and encouraged me to keep both. I had to explain to him the way things work and how when you buy two pairs of jeans that fit when you only need one you will inevitably lose just enough weight to make them look like shit and also waste the money you spent on expensive ass Gap jeans. And therefor you have to start all over again with more money and more jeans to cry over. On the other hand, if I kept only one pair I'd be sporting the same poundage through next summer and I'd wear out the one pair and find myself in exactly the same place I was two months ago with no friggin jeans to wear. Pretty much he said keep them if you want to and don't worry about the money. Pretty much either way I'm forking out more money for clothes and I'm thinking nudity is highly underrated. Wearing clothes you like is just too emotionally trying, I'm worn out with it.

Thursday, April 09, 2009

"I've already been injured once this month!"

I totally didn't do the tracy video yesterday so you can all yell at me in the comments. I got home late and even though I spent the morning washing dishes my boyfriend asked me if I washed any dishes when I got home. So I had to beat him up and that makes a girl tired. He's the one making all the dishes dirty boiling sap for maple syrup so it's NOT MY FAULT that all of our dishes are in the sink or that my soup pot is covered in woodburn. I made that up, I don't know what it's called when your boyfriend uses your best cooking pots on an outdoor wood fire and they all turn black, maybe treason. When all the sap is boiled he'll be the one washing dishes until the cows come home, or until they're actually made of metal again...whatever comes first.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

"No. I'm a rebel. You're an idiot."

The muscle pain today is confusing because I didn't do any Tracy exercise yesterday. I felt a little painful last night and I wrote it off to a long day and then now, I'm thinking I need to get some serious stretching. You hurt if you do it and if you don't, that's hardly fair. I'm definitely going to do some work today. A lot of her exercises are things you can do while you're just hanging around. it's not in the "strategic muscle exhaustion" routine but I think it'll loosen up my muscles a little. My right shoulder in particular is killing me, which sucks because usually exercise makes it feel better.

I'm going to have to work pilates in to my routine because tracy's arm exercises are really awesome but I can't live with my shoulder acting up. You'd think it's just an arm and why do I need it anyway when I don't have a real job but seriously, arms are important. My boss lost her balance a little yesterday and grabbed my arm for support, which is essentially my job, and I thought it might rip right off. And it's not like you can tell an old lady to let go, you just have to ride it out. Yikes.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

"and his hair was perfect.."

All of a sudden I have a lot of work to do. One of the people that worked with me quit, which is a relief, and now I have a buffet of hours to work. It's awesome for my savings account but I need to do a lot of planning. I've made rather a lot of commitments based on my previous schedule and now I have to uncommit to almost everything. I've had about 10 hair cut appointments these last few weeks and between my work and the hairdresser being in the hospital, I haven't been able to keep any of them. My hair is a mess.

I still have to do my tracy video today and I'm seriously dreading it. I really, really don't want to. It's the first time I've felt like I really didn't want to do it since I brought it home. I'm at that hard point in the day where you decide whether to take a day off from exercising and then it turns in to two years of sitting on the couch eating frosting. Probably one day of rest won't be the end of all calorie burning but I wonder at my will power. Make sure you all kick my ass if I don't get my tracy on tomorrow, seriously.

Monday, April 06, 2009

"advisably, soberly, and in the fear of god"

That ugly purse has gone up to 15 dollars and I find myself feeling much more positive about all those questions this morning. And also puppy and I went for a long walk/jog and oh my god that tracy anderson! Can I tell you about my ass, is that too personal? because it's burning. Not in an ointment sort of way but in an oh my god those exercises really do work sort of way. She advises you not to do any exercise but hers, because her method is meant to create the tiniest body possible and other exercises "bulk" but I don't really care about that so we went for a jog but if I had realized the pain factor I might have rethought. Also, I think she found a way to work the muscles way below the abs and the jog must have used them too because WHOA, and also DAMN. It feels like my uterus did sit ups which is way more bizarre to experience than it is to read, if that's possible. I'm so glad I have a blog because writing that in a journal just wouldn't be as fulfilling.

"I didn't order any vampires."

I can't believe I am awake at 4:30 on a monday morning answering ebay buyer questions about a purse that has so far raised the princely sum of 1.29. I would have thought perhaps a bid could reach even two whole dollars before I have to measure every single seam but I would have been wrong. Very wrong. And also, there are only eleven hours left. Folks had 7 whole days to ask me to list the various parts of this purse that are leather. Leather trim means leather trim, the trim parts are leather...it might even be fake leather...evil!...for 1.29 I just don't care what the zipper pulls are made of. I'm sure I'd have been happier to answer these questions last week, god I hate auctions.

I totally feel better now. And I'm totally feeling the tracy anderson burn. I routinely cook with cast iron and yesterday I couldn't lift the pan. I've only done the video three times and I can't quite do it all at once yet. I have to take a rest break between legs, arms, arms, and crunches or I simply can't muster the will to live. I do find her attitude helpful. Before the arm section(s), which is/are the absolute worst she says "you might think you can't do this but you can and you must" and it's not that I think she is the be all, end all of trainers but she doesn't have a wishy washy attitude about it. You have to work to get results and you can do everything she does it just hurts. It's about will power and determination and pain and I think that's a pretty fair view of weight loss. If it were easy we wouldn't be here whining about our bodies. It's work and if you're willing to do it all you get results, I think that's a very healthy way to look at things. I have clearly been unwilling to work very hard, uhm, this last year and there's no room for that...not if I ever want to stop being a whiner. I'm definitely going to keep up with this dvd because I've never felt my arms this sore, sore in places I didn't know I had. I can already feel a difference in the muscles under my arms and it's only been three times. Just think if I didn't have to sit and cry between sets!!!

Friday, April 03, 2009

"Yeah, we came to warn you about the... angry puppy."

It's very seriously raining today and Knox and I have been stuck inside all day. We both need exercise but funny enough Knox doesn't feel like doing that tracy anderson dvd with me. Shocking. It's just too wet outside to walk, falling on your ass in mud is funny the first 5 times and then it starts to get old. It's not so much the falling and the bruising, it's the laundry. I spend all day washing mud off clothes, floors, puppies. Spring is a very dirty season.

The ebay sales are finally coming to an end. I couldn't be more relieved. It's actually very interesting to see what people like. Obviously I liked all the things I'm selling because I chose and bought them but some things have fallen farther out of favor and I'll be so glad when the acid green tommy bag is gone even if it is only sold for $1.04. In the way of things that will eventually go on ebay I just tried on yet more jeans. One pair fits very well and one pair will be totally awesome in about 5 pounds. Famous last words. I'd better keep the receipt!

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Ok, seriously, tracy anderson is a masochist...a tiny, tiny masochist

Dudes, I didn't even use the weights...three pounds, two pounds, I'm talking no pounds here and I died. I actually died. All the famous people who do her routine say "I hurt in places I didn't know existed" and seriously, dude, I only finished ten minutes ago and I'm bro with a capital KEN. Tomorrow I might need a full body amputation. Or a pound of advil. It's a toss up.

Everything was completely do-able even if I did want to kill myself while doing it. Sometimes I look at the things I'm supposed to do for Ana and I think "no, no, no one can do that" but this I can do. I don't want to do it EVER AGAIN but I will and I'll report back, for the good of the people. But wow, wow, wow, she's a seriously hardcore little pixie person. Honest though, about twenty times during the routine she says "this really kills" or "your arm should be really hurting right now" which I appreciate. I hate it when the instructor is all happy and fluffy and perky while you're in your living room chewing at your wrists trying to draw blood. I hate perky when I'm trying not to die, I guess I'm particular that way.