If Trader Joe's made a better can of black bean soup, I wouldn't have had a lunch of mini Snickers. It is totally their fault. The vegetarian chili is good, why not the black bean soup? I'm at the end of the line with convenience style black bean soup. The canned version stinks, the dry add hot water version really stinks. It looks like I'm going to have to actually cook it myself, which I'm sure is a violation of my bean soup civil rights. I'm certain of it. I'm so calling my lawyer.
This morning was rough, but this afternoon rocks. The best thing about having a long complicated morning is that the afternoon flies by comparison. I've had time to take a look back at Halloween last year and think about this eating candy all the time malarky. Last year I wanted to be the person who doesn't buy a bunch of cheap candy just because it's cheap. I wanted that crap off my radar. Reading that puts into very sharp focus how much I haven't achieved lately. Instead of thinking "cheap over-marketed processed crap" whenever I see a pile of Halloween candy I've been thinking "yum". That is not ok. I guess I've been glossing over how I feel about these little things because I don't feel good about them and I don't want to think about it. Way to lead a healthy life.
It's not the specific foods that are a problem for me. Anything in moderation is ok, even Halloween candy. Things haven't been in moderation and I haven't been really thinking my decisions through. The last two weeks I've been making an effort to buy the right food and enough of it so that I don't get home and have to think about what's for dinner. This weekend we went to Freeport to pick up a dresser, I didn't do any outlet shopping because I didn't need to. I didn't need to and I really want to get out of debt and order my new computer more than I want to shop sales at Banana Republic. So why did we stop at Chili's for lunch when we could've gone home and had lunch at a perfectly reasonable hour? No one would've starved to death. It wasn't a particularly special place, or special meal. It was just lazy and there is no way that I can exercise enough to make up for lazy food decisions and still lose weight. I can't do both and it's getting old. I used to be so good at thinking "do I really want this" before sitting around to watch tv or eating a piece of bad candy. Time to flex the most important weight loss muscle, the brain.