my boyfriend is a skinny boy, i'm sure i've mentioned it before. he is tall and lanky and was a runner in highschool. he eats more bacon than anyone i've ever known. he eats whatever he wants and never gains a pound. i could envy him that if i didn't know how much he hates it. he hates being the skinny boy.
some fat people hear how fat they are their whole lives, sometimes it's just the elephant in the room. no one holds back when you're too skinny. the boyfriend has been hearing his whole life that he needs a few more pounds. he still hears it, we both do. i keep hearing that i have to fatten him up. you can trust me when i say i try. geez, the boy eats a bowl of ice cream every night before bed.
he can't control his weight. as a teenager his doctor told his parents to keep feeding him. he had prescribed a 6000 calorie diet that included vast amounts of fast food specifically for the high calories. he HATED it. he didn't want to be force fed anymore than a dieter wants to feel starved. it's so ironic.
sometimes it makes me think we are who we are. i know i can exercise more and eat fewer easter bunnies and probably i'll drop a few pounds. but i don't hold out hope of having a supermodel body. i hold out hope to maybe drop a size or two, in time. unlike most fat girls, i don't have many skinny clothes. one day a few months before i started this blog i went through my closet with the mantra "you will not lose twenty pounds!". i got a lot more space in my closet and the thrift shop got a whole bunch of designer clothes in size 12.
i saved two skirts that i couldn't part with, those are the last of my skinny clothes. i was telling the boyfriend that i would be happy if i could fit into those two expensive skirts again. and he said "that's great! will you have to gain ten pounds after to fit into the expensive skirt you're wearing now?". smart ass.