*

10 pounds down 32 pounds to go!

Monday, June 29, 2009

"just woke up dead one day"

We've kept the chickens alive for four whole days, yay us! The feather sisters are getting their wing feathers and are practicing flying over each other. It's really cute but the others don't like it, funny enough. We've been making an effort to handle them often so things are easier when they're bigger and flightier but it makes them cranky. I'm terrified one of them is going to try flying out of my hands and make a cartoon splat on the floor. They are growing so fast it's insane. Their little drumsticks are particularly adorable, they like to stretch after napping and the legs are so chubby and cute. We spend a lot of time standing over their box cooing at them, we're the biggest dorks ever.

I have to make a scary call to the insurance company in exactly 9 minutes and it might make me cranky. It might ruin my day completely but there's no point in putting it off. If I don't get everything settled as soon as possible some mysterious tree will fall on the Rogue and crush it to death. I meant to put it in the garage first thing but Matt has a job parked in front of the door. 'Course if it was in the garage and I didn't make the call at exactly 8 probably there would be a freak fire, better not risk it.

As an aside, I can't tell you how weird I feel about being an suv driver. It feels like driving a bus, there's so much more vehicle behind the rearview mirror than I'm used to. We talked about it incessantly and there was no way around it, that dog needs a car like a bus and it's not a sin to have all wheel drive in Maine. Matt keeps telling me it's actually a "crossover" and not an "suv" but the guilt is still there. Massive, massive amounts of guilt. Maybe I should get the virgin mary car seat covers and hang a crucifix on the mirror.

Friday, June 26, 2009

"an acid stomach and a sudden urge to weep"

I signed the papers yesterday and I feel no joy at all. Everyone at the dealership was saying congratulations and of course they're happy they just sold a car but I am not feeling the congratulations. The best I can muster toward positive emotion is satisfaction that it's all over and we won't have to do it again...hopefully. The finance lady asked if we were going to celebrate and I said I'd be going home to vomit profusely and it's good we already signed the papers because I think I made her sick. Never be honest in a car dealership, it upsets the cosmic balance.

So I drove it home yesterday and now it's in the garage...where it will stay until we pay it off or until my other car has a full head rotation exorcist experience. It would be safe to say I'm a little bit on edge but apparently not too on edge to google search hello kitty car seat covers. My need to protect the new car and also be a dork come fabulously together here. Apparently I'm on a budget now so I might have to use an old blanket and just visualize hello kitty in the stains, le sigh.

"celebrities are so much smaller in person"



These are our newest babies, six Barred Rock Chicks. So far it's going very well. Chairman meow is interested but not attempting to actually get at them, Knox is only interested when we are but enjoyed sniffing the chick I presented him with and the chicks are peeping happily and sleeping like a feathery carpet. I'm working on telling them apart but so far I can only tell the fluffy one and the even fluffier one apart from the crowd. I might just name them all susan and forget about it until one turns out to be a rooster.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

"the guilty guy always asks for a lawyer"

I saw the sun for almost three whole minutes this afternoon, it was awesome. It's gone now but I'll always have the memories. Actually tomorrow is supposed to be nicer...before the thunderstorm. Not that I'm complaining about the rain, the garden is doing wonderfully. I'm still sort of surprised that all those things we planted are growing. It's amazing. The corn is up and lots of dry beans, potatoes and enough onions to eat one a day all winter...not that we'd want to we just have to remember not to plant so many next year. I have to thin some carrots and lettuces but right now the garden is so soft you can't really walk in it without causing a plant apocalypse so they'll have to wait. I'm really excited about all the growing and I'm even more excited that I don't have to lug water all the way up the hill, YAY RAIN!

I'm planning a long hike for tomorrow if I don't have to work. It's been too long since we've walked in the park and I really miss it. I'm even prepared to walk if it's wet, Knox and I have been cooped up inside too long and he's always such a good boy when he's sleeping. Things with my job have been really crazy lately but are starting to improve, or maybe I'm just learning how to deal. I'm working hard to remind myself that I'm not her mother or her keeper and if she cancels all her doctor's appointments the day before and neglects to tell me...well, whatever. It's extra stressful to find your employment wavering when you're trying to buy a car but I think things will be ok. It's sort of good for my job security that we have to keep remaking appointments. The women I work with applaud my patience so I'm trying to live up to that. It's definitely work.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

The Bickersons

Yesterday Knox and I went to the pet store to get kitty a new litterbox and instead we got him a backpack. We also met some very sweet kitties up for adoption, a pair who would like to stay together and seemed cautiously curious about Knox. I really wanted those kitties. In fact, I want to take home every kitty I see all the time. There was a free kitten sign on a road nearby and I had to will myself every day not to stop, fortunately it's gone now. I asked Matt what he'd do if I came home with another cat and he just shook his head, like the possibility of owning one more pet just wouldn't fit in his brain. He has to keep reminding me that the chickens will be pets too and will upset the house enough for the next few weeks without adding a territorial kitty battle upstairs.

When I think about it properly I know it's a bad idea, Chairman Meow will crush the opposition no problem. She hisses with deadly accuracy. I had secretly thought that if I got a pair they might stand a chance but probably it'll just turn into trench warfare for the next five years or until someone finds our bodies with multiple sharp cuts at the jugular. Puppy will miss us. He'll be only a slave in the new society, forced to surrender his treats and toys for the greater good. Guess I'd better stop searching petfinder all afternoon.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

"I've been stabbed by plenty of girls."

A long weekend in NH with a visit to the car store and a case of maalox. Turns out I didn't need any help to get the car and I'm not sure if that makes me feel better or worse. On the upside I have no desire to eat anything ever again or until the car is paid off (and seriously I haven't even signed anything yet...). But probably everyone is tired of hearing about my money spending induced nausea, dementia and general insanity. I'm tired of it too, I really want my brain back.

It would be a good time to take a mind clearing walk...but it's rrrrraining. Apparently it's been raining non-stop since I left and it's supposed to rain all week. There are plenty of things I can do today but I was looking forward to getting some miles in. I've come to the place in hiking where my muscles miss it when I don't go. It's a good place to be, makes me feel like a real hiker. I had been thinking a real hiker might brave the rain but it's certain the trails are sloppy and unsafe, the roads slippery. It's probably smarter to just do my chores and hope for dryer days between work and chickens, picking up the car and signing my life away.

The most exciting thing is the arrival of the chicks. We've been waiting for them for so long, the anticipation is huge. One of my jobs today is to have their first house all ready, I even have chick toys. I'm so excited about my babies! I'm hoping they do well because we might have to leave them for a while when the car comes. We'd hoped Matt's dad would babysit but he can't...and anyway he said he didn't know how. All he has to do is make sure there is food and water but I hope something else comes up that we need a babysitter for because I really want to trick him into clucking over the box for hours on end...hehehe.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

"the regime from which the free radicals want to break free?"

It occurred to me today that I spend an awful lot of my time rearranging the natural colors of my person. Nail polish and nail polish remover, sunscreen and self tanner, make up...I don't have a good opposite for that, it seems a bit much to complain about soap. Anyway, it takes up kind of a lot of time. Three kinds of face cream, body lotion and sunscreen a couple times a day...not that I'm complaining...it's not shotgun skin care. It just occurred to me this morning as I was debating the state of my manicure how much time all this girl being takes. It takes up a lot of my bathroom cupboards too. I just got this new nail polish too, purple is supposed to be "the" color this summer. And she wonders where the cupboard space goes.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

"what a good boy!!!"

Matt's mum asked me to help her do a new resume this afternoon since I've written seven billion resumes this year it seemed like a perfect match. I just emailed her the finished products and hopefully it all works out, she's really tired of her job and whoa do I know what that's like. I brought puppy with me so he could visit his grampy, who he loves. The two of them are best friends, the man really lights up when woof is around. Even as I was pulling out of the driveway I could hear him saying what a good dog he is, I think they might get married...such is the love. Hopefully they can all get together this weekend when I am away so Matt doesn't suffer too much being a single parent.

I have a ton of shopping to do and no money since I'm probably buying a car very, very soon. I feel this need to search all the couch cushions for change, take in all my cans and bottles and sell my plasma. I know that I'm not the first adult with adequate jobbage to purchase a car but it's seriously disturbing my zen. SO MUCH MONEY! WHY! Who knew horseless carriages could ever be such a big deal? How much does a horse cost? How many miles per bale do you get with a pony? What about a hybrid? Donkeys are supposed to be very efficient.

Clearly I'm losing my mind. Every thought I have turns to transmissions and color options and oh my god insurance! How much is freaking insurance anyway? I'm pretty sure you don't have to insure a horse, I should really look into building a barn.

Bar Island and the heathen invaders





Sunday, June 14, 2009

"And while you're at it don't criticize my methods."



Matt and Puppy say hi from the ampitheater carriage road. It turns out that we had one nice day between all the rain so we hit the park again. It was really beautiful actually and not too many people. Woof made friends with some tiny dogs who stood on their back feet to get better acquainted by licking his face and it was adorable. We walked about six miles which was enough for a saturday afternoon hike and then we undid all the healthy with the biggest small ice creams we've ever had. C'est la vie.

It's beautiful again today and I'm trying to decide what to do. I have an urge to go back to the park, I suppose that's not a bad thing. Walking is good for both of us, it has an uplifting effect on woof's behavior. He's too tired to fight with mrs. bickerson after a few miles of carriage road. My next day off will be spent talking to my dad about buying the new car so maybe I should take the opportunity to relax a little today. It's stresses me out to no end that I can't do it alone, and maybe I could, but I don't have a proper pay stub anymore and god knows that's important to buy huge things in a recession. It'll be nice to have him helping me anyway, father daughter bonding with one thousand papers to sign.

Friday, June 12, 2009

"I don't even know how much an ostrich costs"

I'm not hiking today. It's raining cats and poodles and there have been accidents all over the place. I spent all night asking matt if I should just plan to go home and visit my family instead and he refused to help me decide. I just could not make my brain choose, so I'm in my house and not hiking and I'm trying to get organized. I arranged my flours and baking chocolate, two things that get totally out of control for no apparent reason, and now I'm working on my desk. I always feel better when my kitchen is in order, it's cathartic.

I'm every so slightly putting off making an appointment for a physical. I really need to have my thyroid checked again. I wasn't really happy with the diagnosis last time but I felt all right so I didn't worry about it...now I feel like crap and I'm pretty sure that's why. My sister has the same condition, both sisters actually, and she always says she can tell when her thyroid medication isn't right because she feels like crap. I've felt like crap for a while and it really is time to get ye olde blood checked. Having trouble losing weight is of course one of the symptoms of dysfunctional thyroid, which sucks, but being cold apparently is too and that one freaks me out. It was in the 70's last week and I had sweatshirts on and the windows closed. I felt colder than I did all winter when it was below zero. Part of me thinks that could actually be sort of helpful for keeping cool this summer but thyroid problems can make you really sick so probably I shouldn't dilly dally. I did just buy a bunch of warm walking clothes and it's going to piss me off if I'm hot as hell this summer and I spent all that money at northface. Shopping is a total burden.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

"fire bad, tree pretty"

I've bad a pretty good few days at work so I'm feeling positive about that, we had a rough patch and how hopefully things are improving. I'm planning another ten mile walk for puppy and I and I'm looking forward to it. Last week my planning sucked but the walk was awesome so we're going to do it again but with extra water and food and the seven maps I bought. I'm also going to pick up a pocket knife and a bulb for my flashlight and I downloaded a compass application for my iphone. The part of me that's lived here for years thinks this is ridiculous preparation for a park on the island with so many people and so many roads to civilization but it's good for the sanity. And the walking is good for the legs, I feel like an american gladiator but sadly only from the waist down. Shame you can't hike with your arms.

I'm enjoying hiking more than I ever thought. I wish I'd started years ago but sheesh if wishes were horses a love of hiking would be somewhere in the middle of my, uhm, herd. Whatever. I'm hiking now and I'm liking it. I have a small goal to hike Cadillac before the summer is over. It's supposed to be an easy climb but high, apparently the highest peak on the east coast north of Rio. I'm starting with the carriage roads and I have almost all of the easy trails done and then I'll move to the more difficult ones. Fortunately there's enough information on these trails to fill a town full of books. I'm hoping to get Matt hiking with us, he's another one who has lived here a while and doesn't know jack about the trails. We're going to be a family of hikers if it kills me.

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

"I can tell it's sunday because of the guilt"

So, the chicken was labeled "use or freeze by june 7th" and I froze it the night of June 7th and now it's the 9th and I just put some in the oven and it smells bad. Matt says it's ok, I don't know that much about chicken but I'm not sure that's a smell you want to eat. I'll let you know if he suffers chickenosis poisoning or similar.

Netflix is right now buffering the second season of dexter. A season I just put to the top of my queue because it wasn't available to watch now...yesterday. Seriously annoying. Also weird, I keep dreaming about shrinking my laundry. I wake up and I can't remember if I have any clothes that fit. It's freaking me out. I have a history of shrinking my favorite clothes and I'm extra paranoid lately. I might have to disconnect the dryer to retain my sanity.

Friday, June 05, 2009

"you made a face like you had an irritable bowel experience"

I accidentally walked 10 miles today. Puppy and I were supposed to take a short, five mile walk around Parkman mountain. It sounded really great except I didn't take my map with me and we ended up, uhm, very far away from where we started. Here is the map. I started at the 198/3, can you see it...below the Somes Sound label and left of the Jordan Pond House label...there it is. See all those little dashed lines..there's a small loop that goes out and comes back, that's where I meant to walk. We didn't do that. Somehow I missed a marker or took a wrong turn and based on the markers I remember, I walked almost every one of those trails. We went out toward the pond house, down to the Asticou, up again back to the pond house label and down again and then back up to the Bubbles where I realized HOLY SHIT those are the friggin' Bubbles.

The bubbles rock, that's them...taken from the south end of the pond...but I saw them and OH MY GOD I did not want to see them today. Some very nice cyclists passed by and they had an extra map that they shared with me. It was only about five more miles to go all the way back to where my car was but five is a lot when you realize you're lost in the middle of a national park with no food and no water left. I made a command decision to turn tail and run to the Jordan Pond House.

I took woof into the women's room with me because the water fountain wasn't working and we both needed water. Some of the tourist popover eating women looked like they were about to say something before they saw the crazy in my eyes. I'm sure it's against the rules to have a dog in there but I was projecting end of her tether at 100 decibels, I'm pretty sure. We got some water and I scared the hell out of myself in the mirror, and then I called Matt and he said "what do you want me to do? Steal a car and pick you up?" Yes, exactly...so his carpool buddy gave him a ride to fetch us. If I'd had money I would have got a table and some tea instead of sitting in the parking lot trying not to cry but that's yet another thing I didn't have with me. Sigh.

I fail at hiking, seriously. The poor puppy had diarrhea twice, vomited once and broke his leash permanently. I was terrified that he would become really ill in the middle of even no-er where than we already were, I'd never be able to carry him back to civilization. The only things I can think of that didn't go wrong are A) my hiking boots rock, no blisters or pain B) it was freaking beautiful out today, not too hot or sunny C) no bugs. Also we saw some really beautiful bridge work I have no idea where and a very cute deer hopped onto the trail and bounded ahead of us for about a half mile, it was very nature tv. On the upside of everything, puppy is very asleep and might not wake up till sunday. He's so cute when he's sleeping.

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

"I like to look like an idiot twice a day to keep humble"

Firstly, vanilla sugar is awesome and the Vanilla Kifli are awesome and Weeds is awesome (I've been catching up for the new season on netflix). Wait, that was three things, my bad. We walked up Parkman mountain carriage road today, it was really beautiful and really steep. The first mile of the road is uphill, a fact the sweet indian family we met didn't know when they rented bikes this morning. I felt really bad for them but those kids will sleep very well tonight.

It's supposed to be 60 degrees out and I'm freezing. In March I would have been on fire, I don't know what's up with being cold all the time. I googled it and I'm pretty sure I don't have anorexia and the schizophrenia has never been a problem before. Probably it's low thyroid function and I should get tested again. It's been a while since I tested as not needing medication and my health status as perceived by charts and diagrams has changed since then. On the one hand a magic pill would be awesome and on the other I don't want to hear about how my weight is going to kill me. Seriously, I know. Maybe I just need a new doctor so I won't have a panic attack when I make the appointment.