I've been waiting to tell this story, waiting until I could write it down without every other word being offensive and four lettered. The weirdest thing happened to me last week when I went to the grocery store and it's making me more and more angry whenever I think about it. I was just choosing a tomato. It seems simple doesn't it, choosing a tomato at the grocery store. There were a few other shoppers and I waited for a suitable lull around the tomato bin, I didn't want to be rude but still...it's just tomatoes not a bridal sale at FIlene's basement. I picked up a few of the small ones to check them out. It's fair to say I'm a little ocd when it comes to choosing produce. I don't ever take home the first one unless it's perfection is irrefutable. As I picked up the second one the woman next to me said something about not needing to cut in line because she wasn't busy. Obviously I noted it because I remembered to blog it but seriously it's tomatoes so I didn't say anything. When I looked at the third one she said "stop touching them all, I don't want to get swine flu!". What the huh? This was obviously directed at me and it took me a minute to get my head around it. Now, I should have just coughed on her and left but instead I said "If you put a brick through your television you'll have a better life" and then I left. Then she followed me around the market making a "huh" face like I was the one out of line, like I started talking to her, like I am the only person who ever touched those tomatoes which come carefully packaged in little styrofoam jackets, like apparently I'm a pig.
If I wasn't so mad I would have been more freaked out that she kept following me. Who does that exactly? What kind of crazy is that? And if she's so worried about the swine flu why isn't she on a compound in Montana with a semi-automatic? It's been a while since something that weird has happened to me. It was such a refreshing break.