improvement. however slight. i made an appointment with my doctor for the extra curricular prodding before i have to pay for office visits. i'm really hoping to impress her with my massive weight loss (cough) but i'm worried she won't make me get on the scale. i just had a physical, this appointment is really just to check my thyroid dosage. i can't believe i'm worried i won't get to stand on the scale. i feel the most intense urge for her to know i'm trying. the urge for validation maybe?
so i looked a bit more at that fat spouse website. i just don't get it. if you loved someone, you would not want to write such things about them on the internet. you wouldn't even think those kind of things. if you clearly don't love your spouse, get a divorce. better to be a superficial bastard or bastardess getting a divorce for a shitty reason than being a passive aggressive coward on the internet. i would really rather go through a divorce than live with someone who would treat me that way. it makes me sad that people choose to live like that.
i'm slowly working my way down the list of things to do before vacation. i'm stuck on packing right now. i can't decide about packing exercise stuff. if i make room for it and bring it along, i won't use it. if i don't pack anything, i'll want to go for a jog and i'll feel extra guilty if i don't. i was debating this with matt and he asked if we'd be anywhere that you could jog and what would he do while i was jogging*, both of which are reasons that i probably won't get a lot of exercise on this trip. i said i should bring the stepper with us, i'm sure there's room in the passenger seat to step for a few hours while he drove. he said he'd measure it. one of my very favorite things about him is his inability to know when i'm joking. on the first hand it makes me laugh, and on the other it reminds me that not only does he listen to me and take me seriously, he'd do anything for me. including measuring my mini-stepper so i can take it on vacation and use it in the car while we drive. i should have him bronzed.
so, expect a few more angsty posts about how much exercise i can get in on vacation. i've been dreaming about eggplant parmesan from nido's and chocolate croissants from the french bakery, which makes me a little nervous about not running. but i fully expect to be walking every foot of gettysburg, and antietam, and the ford nationals car show at carlisle. so why the hell am i worried? any of you folks ever followed a ford man around a car show? i think i can probably get away with two croissants after that revelation.
*because we're staying with my friends and i think he'll feel weird sitting in their house alone for an hour, which is reasonable.